A Gift Worth Preserving and Appreciating

Her Brothers

8 We have a little sister,
    and she has no breasts.
What shall we do for our sister
    on the day when she is spoken for?
9 If she is a wall,
    we will build on her a battlement of silver,
but if she is a door,
    we will enclose her with boards of cedar.

She

10 I was a wall,
    and my breasts were like towers;
then I was in his eyes
    as one who finds peace.

11 Solomon had a vineyard at Baal-hamon;
    he let out the vineyard to keepers;
    each one was to bring for its fruit a thousand pieces of silver.
12 My vineyard, my very own, is before me;
    you, O Solomon, may have the thousand,
    and the keepers of the fruit two hundred.

He

13 O you who dwell in the gardens,
    with companions listening for your voice;
    let me hear it.

She

14 Make haste, my beloved,
    and be like a gazelle
or a young stag
    on the mountains of spices. – Song of Solomon 8:8-14 ESV

In these closing verses of the poem, there appears what must be the recollections of the woman’s brothers. Long before she was old enough to marry, they were watching over her sexual purity. When she was at an age “too young to have breasts” (Song of Solomon 8:8 NLT), they vowed to do everything in their power to protect her virginity so that she could present herself pure and undefiled to her husband on their wedding night. These loving brothers had agreed to serve as guardians of her purity.

If their young sister proved to have self-discipline and the ability to reject the impure advances of immoral men, they would provide her with an extra measure of protection.

If she is a virgin, like a wall,
    we will protect her with a silver tower. – Song of Solomon 8:9 NLT

The image is that of a battlement or protective wall. If their sister is willing to take all the proper measures to preserve her virginity, the brothers will assist her by acting as a watch tower.

“…if she has kept herself pure under their protective watch, they ‘will build on her a battlement of silver;’ that is, they will reward her virginity with their full blessing and support (‘silver’ perhaps referring to a generous dowry to be given to her husband). They will honor, celebrate, and adorn her self-protection with military splendor. She has fought the good right, and thus she shall be rewarded for her victory.” – Douglass Sean O‘Donnell – Song of Solomon: An Invitation to Intimacy

But what if their sister proved to be prone to promiscuity? Upon reaching puberty, she might decide to give in to the advances of young men who desired to rob her of her purity. In that case, the brothers would up their game and increase their vigilance.

But if she is promiscuous, like a swinging door,
    we will block her door with a cedar bar. – Song of Solomon 8:9 NLT

If she was incapable of controlling her sexual urges, the brothers would act as “guardians of the gate.” While she might not fully understand the value of her chastity, they did and were willing to protect it at all costs. It is likely that a few of her brothers were married men and understood the sanctity of the marriage bed. They had been fortunate to marry young women who had preserved their purity for their wedding night and they wanted that same joyful experience for their sister and her future husband.

It is unclear why the father is never mentioned in these verses, but it could be that he was deceased or simply unwilling to perform his parental duties. Whatever the case, the young woman was blessed to have brothers who took up the mantle of responsibility and served as her loving wall of security.

The efforts of the brothers proved to be effective because the young woman confesses, “I was a virgin, like a wall” (Song of Solomon 8:10 NLT). As an adolescent young girl, she had maintained her purity like a wall – with the loving assistance of her brothers. As a result, she was able to present herself to her husband as pure and undefiled on their wedding night.

…now my breasts are like towers.
When my lover looks at me,
    he is delighted with what he sees. – Song of Solomon 8:10 NLT

In verses 11-12, the former adolescent girl provides a powerful defense for protecting one’s virginity. She describes her purity as a valuable vineyard that one must protect and preserve. It is not for sale to the highest bidder. To drive home her point, she compares her “vineyard” with one owned by Solomon the king. Due to his great wealth, he possessed many vast estates and vineyards. He describes the extensive nature of his land holdings and material possessions in the Book of Ecclesiastes.

I made great works. I built houses and planted vineyards for myself. I made myself gardens and parks, and planted in them all kinds of fruit trees. I made myself pools from which to water the forest of growing trees. I bought male and female slaves, and had slaves who were born in my house. I had also great possessions of herds and flocks, more than any who had been before me in Jerusalem. I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the treasure of kings and provinces. I got singers, both men and women, and many concubines, the delight of the sons of man. – Ecclesiastes 2:4-8 ESV

He readily confessed his unbridled love affair with self-gratification.

…whatever my eyes desired I did not keep from them. I kept my heart from no pleasure… – Ecclesiastes 2:10 ESV

But his wife pointed out that much of what Solomon possessed was not his to enjoy. Even his vineyards were nothing more than income-producing properties.

Solomon has a vineyard at Baal-hamon,
    which he leases out to tenant farmers.
Each of them pays a thousand pieces of silver
    for harvesting its fruit. – Song of Solomon 8:11 NLT

He was paid by others for the use of his vineyard. In a sense, it no longer belonged to him. These men had bought the rights to enjoy the benefits of its fruit. Solomon could count his money, but he couldn’t eat the grapes or enjoy the wine they produced.

Yet, his wife points out that her “vineyard” was hers to give because she had refused to sell it off for temporary pleasure or profit. Because she had walled out her virginity, she had been able to give it to Solomon on their wedding night – at no cost to him. It had been a gift of priceless value, one that even the wealthy and pleasure-obsessed king could never have afforded.

Solomon had been completely unaware of the diligent care with which his wife’s brothers had protected her. He had been oblivious to the hard work they had put in to preserve this “vineyard” of vast worth and unparalleled beauty. But now, he was grateful that they had put in the effort.

In the closing lines of this poem, Solomon and his wife revisit the early days of their relationship. They reminisce about those carefree, love-obsessed moments when their marriage began. It is impossible to know the ages of these two when the poem ends, but they are still deeply in love and express the same passionate longings to be together. Solomon expresses his desire to hear his bride’s voice, and she calls out to him with an invitation to join her one more moment of sexual pleasure. Her vineyard is still hers to give and she willingly offers it to the love of her life.

The poem ends, but their love continues. The eight chapters of the Song of Solomon provide a brief glimpse into the relationship between one man and one woman. But their love story is meant to be the experience of each and every one of God’s children. He created marriage to be a blessing to mankind. The marriage bed was meant to be his gift to be shared by a husband and a wife. The poem provides glimpses of the love lives of these two individuals, but it is not comprehensive or complete. The poem closes with no glowing description of how their marriage ends but the reader is left with the impression that their love for one another never diminished.

What makes this poem difficult to understand is the knowledge that Solomon was far from a monogamous and faithful husband. The Book of 1 Kings reveals that by the time his kingdom came to an end, Solomon had amassed a harem of 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 Kings 11:3). Not only that, many of these women were pagan princesses who brought their false gods with them. 

God had warned His people to avoid any intermarriage with the people who occupied the land of Canaan. Yet, Solomon had chosen to disobey God’s command.

King Solomon loved many foreign women. Besides Pharaoh’s daughter, he married women from Moab, Ammon, Edom, Sidon, and from among the Hittites. The Lord had clearly instructed the people of Israel, “You must not marry them, because they will turn your hearts to their gods.” Yet Solomon insisted on loving them anyway.… And in fact, they did turn his heart away from the Lord. – 1 Kings 11:1-2, 3 ESV

Did the Shulamite woman become just one among the many? Did Solomon’s deep love for her diminish over time? It is difficult to imagine that Solomon’s sexual attraction for his “beloved” remained strong when he had 999 options from which to choose. But none of this diminishes the message contained in the Song of Solomon. There was a moment when Solomon enjoyed and embraced God’s plan for marriage. But somewhere along the way, he allowed his pursuit of unbridled pleasure to replace his dedication to his bride. This man, who had experienced the joys of his bride’s “vineyard,” had become dissatisfied and distracted by the pleasures of this world. He had allowed a love affair with materialism and vanity-fueled pleasure-seeking to rob him of the joys of the marital relationship.

It’s interesting to note that Solomon included a proverb in his collection that contained the following words of wisdom from a man named Agur.

There are three things that amaze me—
    no, four things that I don’t understand:
how an eagle glides through the sky,
    how a snake slithers on a rock,
    how a ship navigates the ocean,
    how a man loves a woman. – Proverbs 3018-19 NLT

Solomon had a harem that contained a thousand women, but he still didn’t understand the love between a woman and a man. God had given him to opportunity to glean all the lessons available through a loving relationship with one woman, but Solomon had squandered it. He had been given an invaluable gift from God but had failed to fully appreciate its worth.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The God-Given Gift of Love and Sexuality

She

1 Oh that you were like a brother to me
    who nursed at my mother’s breasts!
If I found you outside, I would kiss you,
    and none would despise me.
2 I would lead you and bring you
    into the house of my mother—
    she who used to teach me.
I would give you spiced wine to drink,
    the juice of my pomegranate.
3 His left hand is under my head,
    and his right hand embraces me!
4 I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
    that you not stir up or awaken love
    until it pleases.

5 Who is that coming up from the wilderness,
    leaning on her beloved?

Under the apple tree I awakened you.
There your mother was in labor with you;
    there she who bore you was in labor.

6 Set me as a seal upon your heart,
    as a seal upon your arm,
for love is strong as death,
    jealousy is fierce as the grave.
Its flashes are flashes of fire,
    the very flame of the Lord.
7 Many waters cannot quench love,
    neither can floods drown it.
If a man offered for love
    all the wealth of his house,
    he would be utterly despised. – Song of Solomon 8:1-7 ESV

As this epic poem begins to wrap up, the rhetoric within it amps up. It seems that the further along in the dialogue we get, the more shocking the language and imagery becomes. But I don’t think this is all for the shock value. These words are penned by two people who are expressing their deep and abiding affection for one another. Nothing is hidden. There are no subjects that are off-limits or taboo. While this book was divinely inspired like all the other books in the canon of Scripture, when Solomon wrote it, he had no idea it would become part of the Bible, the world’s most popular and widely read book of all time.

So, the imagery and language contained within the Song of Solomon have always confused and disturbed its readers. It seems out of place among all the other books of the Bible. Its content is too controversial and even considered X-rated by some. There are those who avoid this book like the plague. Others, in an attempt to resolve its shocking use of sexual imagery and language, have spiritualized its content to the point where it no longer makes much sense. That is not to say there is no underlying spiritual message contained within the pages of the Song of Solomon but that the graphic and sometimes lurid nature of its content should not be dismissed as nothing more than one lengthy metaphor.

Those who approach this book with a puritanical zeal, wishing to reinterpret its language as nothing more than a symbol of God’s love for His chosen people or Christ’s love for His bride, the Church, end up dehumanizing and diminishing its message. In some sense, their attempt to de-sexualize its content ended up devaluing much of its message. It’s amazing that even today, in our highly sexualized culture, this book still comes across as inappropriate and offensive. There is still a sense in which Christians believe that any talk about the human body or sexuality is inappropriate for polite conversation. But the content in this book is difficult to ignore because it confronts our prudish sensibilities and makes us squirm.  All its talk of intimate body parts and passionate love-making makes us uncomfortable.

Yet, the Song of Solomon is as much a part of the canon of Scripture as the Psalms or the four Gospels. It too was “breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16 ESV). So the question becomes, what is this book attempting to teach us? In what ways could it be trying to reprove and correct us? How could its content be used to train us in righteousness? 

The answers to these questions must be found in the prevailing message of the book. It is impossible to completely dismiss the fact that this is a love poem. It is blatantly and sometimes embarrassingly about the love between a man and a woman. But that should not make us uncomfortable. Love is of God because God is love, and the sexual union between one man and one woman was His idea. But like all of God’s good and gracious gifts, this one was irreparably damaged by the entrance of sin into the world. Satan has taken what God intended for good and turned it into a self-seeking, soul-destroying weapon in his battle against humanity.

Jesus stated, “The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life” (John 10:10 NLT). God created man and woman and endowed them with the capacity for procreation, but He also blessed them with the ability to love and enjoy the intimacy and physicality of the sexual relationship. It was not to be some primal act of hormonal urges designed to propagate the species. God equipped Adam and Eve with the physiological and psychological tools they would need to make more of their kind and to enjoy themselves in the process. That is what the Song of Solomon is all about.

Even in Solomon’s day, prudishness reigned supreme. There was certain actions that were inappropriate and deemed unacceptable in public. His love-struck wife makes that painfully clear when she bluntly states, “Oh, I wish you were my brother, who nursed at my mother’s breasts. Then I could kiss you no matter who was watching, and no one would criticize me” (Song of Solomon 8:1 NLT). This woman couldn’t keep her hands off of her husband. Even in public, she had a difficult time controlling her urge to kiss him. Her rather strange-sounding wish for him to be her brother is just her way of venting her frustration. In her culture, it was fully acceptable for a sister to show affection to her male sibling, even in public. But if she dared to display any signs of affection to her husband while others were watching, she would be considered sex-crazed and lacking in discretion.

She goes on to describe her and her “brother” engaging in intimate activities in their childhood home. The language she uses is blunt and highly suggestive, no matter how much you try to couch it in metaphorical terms. She wants everyone to know just how much she loves her husband. Her discussion of public displays of affection may make us uncomfortable but it should also convict us. The longer her marriage lasts, the more intense her love for her husband grows, and she wants to shout their love from the rooftops. She is proud of and pleased with the love of her life.

This is not a woman for whom marital love has run out of steam. Her sexual desire has not diminished over time. Her husband’s aging body has not lost its appeal for her. The passion of her youth has not gone away and she has spent it on someone else. She remains totally committed to her marriage and deeply in love with her husband.

In a world driven by casual sex, no-fault divorce, and short-term commitments, this woman is a breath of fresh air, and her take on love has never been more timely and needed.

For love is as strong as death,
    its jealousy as enduring as the grave.
Love flashes like fire,
    the brightest kind of flame.
Many waters cannot quench love,
    nor can rivers drown it. – Song of Solomon 8:6-7 NLT

For some reason, we want to separate love from sex. Even Christians can end up viewing sex as somehow tainted and stained by its close association with our fallen human bodies. This dualistic mindset causes us to view love as some kind of separate and distinct characteristic that operates independently from our physical desires and passions. Ever since the fall, mankind has ended up associating sex with lust rather than love. Instead of seeing the sexual act as a gift from God, we have demonized and devalued it to the point of sacrilege. Human sexuality is a gift from God. To view it as somehow dirty or damaged is to question the goodness of God. True love, which includes the physical intimacy between a man and a woman, is a remarkable gift from our Creator-God. It is not to be despised. It is not to be treated with disdain or disgust. Love, as designed by God in the marriage relationship, is priceless value and cannot be bought or sold.

If a man tried to buy love
    with all his wealth,
    his offer would be utterly scorned. – Song of Solomon 8:7 NLT

But it is to be enjoyed and protected at all costs – for a lifetime.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

A Well-Rounded, Fully Satisfying Marriage – For Life

He

1 How beautiful are your feet in sandals,
    O noble daughter!
Your rounded thighs are like jewels,
    the work of a master hand.
2 Your navel is a rounded bowl
    that never lacks mixed wine.
Your belly is a heap of wheat,
    encircled with lilies.
3 Your two breasts are like two fawns,
    twins of a gazelle.
4 Your neck is like an ivory tower.
Your eyes are pools in Heshbon,
    by the gate of Bath-rabbim.
Your nose is like a tower of Lebanon,
    which looks toward Damascus.
5 Your head crowns you like Carmel,
    and your flowing locks are like purple;
    a king is held captive in the tresses.

6 How beautiful and pleasant you are,
    O loved one, with all your delights!
7 Your stature is like a palm tree,
    and your breasts are like its clusters.
8 I say I will climb the palm tree
    and lay hold of its fruit.
Oh may your breasts be like clusters of the vine,
    and the scent of your breath like apples,
9 and your mouth like the best wine.

She

It goes down smoothly for my beloved,
    gliding over lips and teeth.

10 I am my beloved's,
    and his desire is for me.

11 Come, my beloved,
    let us go out into the fields
    and lodge in the villages;
12 let us go out early to the vineyards
    and see whether the vines have budded,
whether the grape blossoms have opened
    and the pomegranates are in bloom.
There I will give you my love.
13 The mandrakes give forth fragrance,
    and beside our doors are all choice fruits,
new as well as old,
    which I have laid up for you, O my beloved. – Song of Solomon 7:1-13 ESV

There is no reference to time in this passage but it would appear that Solomon and his bride have moved beyond the innocent days of marital bliss that surrounded their wedding night into a more substantive relationship in which their attraction for one another has deepened and matured. Their strong sexual desires have not diminished over time but have only grown stronger. They are no less verbose and over-the-top in their descriptions of one another’s bodies but there is a sense in which their words convey a more rich and satisfying love that goes well beyond mere physical attraction.

As he has done before, Solomon waxes eloquently about his wife’s physical attributes, making his way from her feet all the way to the top of her head. While his intimate description of his wife’s body can be a bit off-putting to the reader, it is balanced by his rather strange choice of imagery to convey his point. He describes her belly as “a heap of wheat, encircled with lilies” (Song of Solomon 7:2 ESV). In his eyes, her nose is like “a tower of Lebanon” (Song of Solomon 7:4 ESV). Her breasts are like the clusters of a stately palm tree (Song of Solomon 7:7 ESV).

These lovingly worded descriptions, while well-intentioned and backed by a deep affection for his wife, conjure up an image that only Salvador Dali or Picasso could put on canvas. Frankly, his choice of words paints an appalling rather than appealing image of his beloved. She comes across as some kind of Frankenstein-like monstrosity that is anything but attractive or inviting.

But we know by now that both Solomon and his bride are prone to an overuse of hyperbole and metaphors. He means well and what he says makes all the sense in the world to him. They say love is blind and this just might be an example of that truism. It’s not that Solomon’s wife was unattractive but that he was viewing her through eyes that looked far beneath the surface. He found this woman captivating – both inside and out – and all he can say is, “Oh, how beautiful you are!” (Song of Solomon 7:6 NLT). 

The imagery sugggests intimacy and love-making. He is not only admiring her inner and outer beauty, he is relishing the physical pleasure she brings him. Their relationship is a complete package that satisfies all his longings.

“Whereas the wedding night focused on the purpose of sex as the consummation of marriage, this night focuses on the purpose of sex as the nourishment of marriage… As they fell asleep the last kiss lingered in each other’s minds like the aftertaste of good wine. What an enchanting picture of the sleeping couple!” – S. Craig Glickman, A Song for Lovers

The closing verses of this chapter appear to be from the lips of Solomon’s adoring bride. She has heard his words and is responding with an invitation to join her on a day-trip to the country where they will will enjoy one another’s company. But she tops it off with a not-so-veiled promise of a night of love-making.

Come, my love, let us go out to the fields
    and spend the night among the wildflowers.
Let us get up early and go to the vineyards
    to see if the grapevines have budded,
if the blossoms have opened,
    and if the pomegranates have bloomed.
    There I will give you my love. – Song of Solomon 7:11-12 NLT

This is quite a departure from her earlier refusal to open to him the door to her chamber because she was ready to go to bed. She is now inviting him on an unplanned excursion into the countryside that will feature an unexpected but not undesirable ending.

To a certain degree, this chapter illustrates the concept of keeping the spark alive in a marriage. Spontaneity and surprise can go a long way in maintaining the vibrancy of a relationship that has grown stale or stagnant. A healthy growing marriage requires work and a bit of ingenuity. There is no place for the status quo or business as usual. Predictability and routine have their place but can end up sucking the life out of a relationship. This woman was willing to operate outside the normal boundaries of daily life just to ensure that her husband didn’t lose interest or take her for granted. And that street goes both ways.

The apostle Paul gave couples who were members of the church in Corinth the following advice about sex in marriage:

The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. Do not deprive each other of sexual relations… – 1 Corinthians 7:3-5 NLT

Whether we want to admit it or not, sex is a significant part of the marriage relationship, and it doesn’t necessarily diminish over time. Busyness and self-centeredness can force a couple to put their sexual relationship on the back burner, where it can languish for long periods of time. This can lead to resentment, disappointment, anger, hurt, feelings of rejection, and, ultimately, the temptation to seek satisfaction outside the bounds of the marriage.

As Solomon and his wife aged and their marriage matured, they were going to remain diligent and determined to protect the physical dimension of their relationship. Over time, the call to procreate would be replaced with the invitation to appreciate the wonderful nature of human sexuality within the bonds of matrimony. It is a gift from God and is meant to be enjoyed for a lifetime.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

What God Has Joined Together

Maidens

1 Where has your beloved gone,
    O most beautiful among women?
Where has your beloved turned,
    that we may seek him with you?

She

2 My beloved has gone down to his garden
    to the beds of spices,
to graze in the gardens
    and to gather lilies.
3 I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine;
    he grazes among the lilies.

He

4 You are beautiful as Tirzah, my love,
    lovely as Jerusalem,
    awesome as an army with banners.
5 Turn away your eyes from me,
    for they overwhelm me—
Your hair is like a flock of goats
    leaping down the slopes of Gilead.
6 Your teeth are like a flock of ewes
    that have come up from the washing;
all of them bear twins;
    not one among them has lost its young.
7 Your cheeks are like halves of a pomegranate
    behind your veil.
8 There are sixty queens and eighty concubines,
    and virgins without number.
9 My dove, my perfect one, is the only one,
    the only one of her mother,
    pure to her who bore her.
The young women saw her and called her blessed;
    the queens and concubines also, and they praised her.

10 “Who is this who looks down like the dawn,
    beautiful as the moon, bright as the sun,
    awesome as an army with banners?”

She

11 I went down to the nut orchard
    to look at the blossoms of the valley,
to see whether the vines had budded,
    whether the pomegranates were in bloom.
12 Before I was aware, my desire set me
    among the chariots of my kinsman, a prince.

Others

13 Return, return, O Shulammite,
    return, return, that we may look upon you.

He

Why should you look upon the Shulammite,
    as upon a dance before two armies? – Song of Solomon 6:1-13 ESV

In this chapter, we seem to be witnessing a highly competitive compliment duel between Solomon and his new bride. These two love birds end up dishing out the mutual flattery in huge doses as if each is trying to one-up the other in the commendation department.

It all begins with her friends questioning the whereabouts of the maiden’s missing husband. This all started with a dream in which the new bride refused her husband entry into her bed chamber. Her excuse was that she was already prepared for bed and didn’t want to get up to open the door. He persisted for a while but finally gave up, so when she eventually changed her mind and opened the door, he was nowhere to be found. This led her on a desperate search and she begged her friends for their assistance.

Their response comes across as a bit sarcastic in tone.

“Where has your lover gone,
    O woman of rare beauty?
Which way did he turn
    so we can help you find him?” – Song of Solomon 6:1 NLT

This doesn’t appear to be a legitimate concern for his well-being but seems to be the caddy response of a few jealous and unsympathetic peers. These women have had to watch as their former unmarried friend became the bride of the kingdom's most powerful and influential man. Not only is he rich and of royal pedigree, but he’s handsome beyond belief. Their reticence to participate in her search party seems to be driven by their petty jealousy. But remember, this entire episode is taking place within the Shulamite maiden’s dream. This means that what we are reading is the figment of her overactive imagination. This conversation never actually took place in real life. In her subconscious, she imagines her former friends as disgruntled and envious because of her good fortune.

Her response to their sarcastic question reveals that she saw through their insincere show of concern. She answers them by rubbing their noses in her good fortune.

My lover has gone down to his garden,
    to his spice beds,
to browse in the gardens
    and gather the lilies.
I am my lover’s, and my lover is mine.
He browses among the lilies. – Song of Solomon 6:2-3 NLT

While some scholars see this as a reference to an actual garden, it makes much more sense to see it as yet another thinly veiled metaphor for the sexual act. In a way, the bride is describing the intimacy she enjoys with her husband. This is the same terminology used by Solomon in chapter five, verse 1.

As in any dream, the scenes change quickly and dramatically. In one moment, she is searching for her missing husband, and then, as if out of nowhere, she is enjoying an intimate moment of passionate love.

This is followed by Solomon’s vivid and somewhat verbose description of his wife’s beauty.

You are beautiful, my darling,
    like the lovely city of Tirzah.
Yes, as beautiful as Jerusalem,
    as majestic as an army with billowing banners. – Song of Solomon 6:4 NLT

He finds her beauty to be captivating and impossible to ignore. He can’t take his eyes off of her, no matter how hard he tries. He even brags that he would choose her as his one and only, even if he had “sixty queens and eighty concubines and countless young women” from which to choose (Song of Solomon 6:8 NLT). Sadly, this scenario would become an eventual reality. The day would come when Solomon amassed a harem consisting of 700 wives and 300 concubines. His insatiable and uncontrollable love for the opposite sex would eventually get the best of him, resulting in a life marked by immorality and idolatry.

…his wives turned away his heart. For when Solomon was old his wives turned away his heart after other gods, and his heart was not wholly true to the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father. For Solomon went after Ashtoreth the goddess of the Sidonians, and after Milcom the abomination of the Ammonites. So Solomon did what was evil in the sight of the Lord and did not wholly follow the Lord… – 1 Kings 11:3-6 ESV

But at this moment in the poem, Solomon appears to be committed to his wife alone. He is speaking hyperbolically, exaggerating his words for emphasis. But his statement is almost prophetic, foreshadowing a less-than-stellar future lurking on the horizon.

Verses 11-12 appear to be the words of Solomon’s wife as she expresses yet another metaphorical description of one of their sexual encounters. These two are deeply in love, and while her dream features a brief moment of separation, she is going out of her way to insist that their physical attraction has not waned in the least.

I went down to the nut orchard
    to look at the blossoms of the valley,
to see whether the vines had budded,
    whether the pomegranates were in bloom.
Before I was aware, my desire set me
    among the chariots of my kinsman, a prince. – Song of Solomon 6:11-12 NLT

The two are reunited emotionally and physically. Despite their temporary separation, relegated to a dream, they still love one another deeply.

Verse 13 appears to be the call of her jealous friends, who long for things to go back to the way they were before.

Return, return to us, O maid of Shulam.
    Come back, come back, that we may see you again. – Song of Solomon 6:13 NLT

They miss the good old days when the maiden was one of them. They would prefer for her to be single again, rather than enjoying the pleasures and perks of marriage to the king. This simple verse virtually shouts the envy that clouds their thinking and prevents them from rejoicing in her good fortune.

But Solomon is unwilling to give up his bride and chides the maidens for longing to disrupt their union by fomenting a break in their relationship. He does not want anyone, friend or foe, to come between him and his bride. This man is committed to his bride for the long haul, and he will not allow anyone or anything to separate them. He almost echoes the words of Jesus when He stated, “Let no one split apart what God has joined together” (Mark 10:9 NLT.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The Inevitable Bump in the Road

He

1 I came to my garden, my sister, my bride,
    I gathered my myrrh with my spice,
    I ate my honeycomb with my honey,
    I drank my wine with my milk.

God

Eat, friends, drink,
    and be drunk with love!

She

2 I slept, but my heart was awake.
A sound! My beloved is knocking.
“Open to me, my sister, my love,
    my dove, my perfect one,
for my head is wet with dew,
    my locks with the drops of the night.”
3 I had put off my garment;
    how could I put it on?
I had bathed my feet;
    how could I soil them?
4 My beloved put his hand to the latch,
    and my heart was thrilled within me.
5 I arose to open to my beloved,
    and my hands dripped with myrrh,
my fingers with liquid myrrh,
    on the handles of the bolt.
6 I opened to my beloved,
    but my beloved had turned and gone.
My soul failed me when he spoke.
I sought him, but found him not;
    I called him, but he gave no answer.
7 The watchmen found me
    as they went about in the city;
they beat me, they bruised me,
    they took away my veil,
    those watchmen of the walls.
8 I adjure you, O daughters of Jerusalem,
    if you find my beloved,
that you tell him
    I am sick with love. – Song of Solomon 5:1-8 ESV

Having completed their wedding night, the groom declares his joy at having experienced the intimacy of the marriage bed with the love of his life. His words, while poetic and metaphorical in nature, are thinly veiled descriptions of this momentous and memorable occasion. He speaks these words of satisfaction to himself as he reflects on the physical pleasures that accompanied the consecration of their God-ordained union. He is not bragging about his sexual exploits but simply expressing his joyful delight and deep appreciation for all that has taken place.

He describes the gift of his bride’s virginity as a gift received with gratitude, and he makes it clear that it belongs solely to himself. Take note of the number of times he uses the first-person possessive suffix: “my.”

“I came to my garden, my sister, my bride, I gathered my myrrh with my spice, I ate my honeycomb with my honey, I drank my wine with my milk.”

He uses that same word nine times in one verse, making it virtually impossible to miss the message he is sending. His bride belongs to him and him alone. She has given him the most valuable item she possesses, the gift of her body and the commitment of her ongoing fidelity and faithfulness – for life. And he does not take this gift lightly.

We live in an age where sex has become a commodity, bought and sold to the highest bidder, and looked upon as nothing more than a biological interchange between two consenting adults. In our world, sex carries no real value other than the pleasure it might bring to one or both of the participants. But from God’s divine perspective, sex was always intended to be an expression of the union between one man and one woman, and it was always linked to the ordinance of marriage. Yes, it is the sole means by which humanity can reproduce more of its kind, but there has always been more to sex than procreation. It is to be viewed as a gift from God and treated with the utmost respect and sanctity.

Solomon was right to view his wife’s body as his own but his statements of possessiveness do not convey ownership or a sense of control. His wife is not his personal property to be used, abused, or forced to satisfy his sexual fantasies or comply with his every command. Solomon is expressing the same sentiment that Adam did when he saw Eve for the first time.

“This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” – Genesis 2:23 NLT

Adam was fully aware that this hand-crafted gift from God was the byproduct of his own flesh and blood. Eve was a literal part of him.

…the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the LORD God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. – Genesis 2:21-22 NLT

The apostle Paul adds another twist to this remarkable physical relationship between a husband and a wife, declaring that the man must view his wife as a permanent expression of his own personhood. She is to be seen as a vital part of himself and treated with love, honor, dignity, and respect at all times.

…husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. – Ephesians 5:28-29 NLT

The second half of verse 5 has proven to be a conundrum for biblical scholars over the centuries. There has been much debate concerning the speaker behind the words, with some speculating that they are the words of the wedding guests while others attribute them to Solomon as he rejoins the wedding guests after having consummated his marriage. What makes them difficult to understand is the use of the word, “friends,” which is in the plural form. If these are the words of Solomon, to whom is he speaking? And if the wedding guests are the source of these words, why would they be anywhere near the bedroom of Solomon and his bride?

It makes much more sense to view these as the words of God Himself, as He encourages the couple to enjoy the gift He has provided for them and to do so for years to come.

“Oh, lover and beloved, eat and drink! Yes, drink deeply of your love!” – Song of Solomon 5:1b NLT

Solomon’s rapturous recollection of his wedding night is followed by a far less delightful description of the loss of intimacy between the couple. No timeline is given as to when this event took place, but it is clear that something happened between Solomon and his new wife. The joy of their wedding night was interrupted by their first fight.

Solomon’s wife has yet another dream in which she hears the impassioned pleas of her husband begging for her to open the doors to her chamber.

“Open to me, my treasure, my darling,
    my dove, my perfect one.
My head is drenched with dew,
    my hair with the dampness of the night.” – Song of Solomon 5:2 NLT

But rather than comply with his wishes, she offers up excuses.

“I have taken off my robe.
    Should I get dressed again?
I have washed my feet.
    Should I get them soiled?” – Song of Solomon 5:3 NLT

It would appear that she was already in bed and had no desire to accommodate her husband’s calls to let him in. But her refusal to open the door only made Solomon more aggressive in his approach as made repeated attempts to open the door. His persistence made an impact on his wife, softening her heart and creating in her a desire to change her mind and open the door. But when she finally relented and unlocked the door to her chamber, her husband was nowhere to be found; he had given up and walked away.

“I jumped up to open the door for my love,
    and my hands dripped with perfume.
My fingers dripped with lovely myrrh
    as I pulled back the bolt.
I opened to my lover,
    but he was gone!
    My heart sank.” – Song of Solomon 5:5-6 NLT   

She was too late. She had waited too long. Her disinterest had produced disappointment and now she was forced to go on yet another nocturnal search for her missing husband (Song of Solomon 3:1-5). Rebuffed by his wife’s persistent refusal to open her door, Solomon had stalked away, probably in a state of anger and frustration.

This scene is all too familiar to any married couple. How quickly the love and infatuation of the wedding night can turn to disinterest and disappointment. As beautiful and appealing as the sexual aspect of marriage can be, it cannot be the sole source of solidarity. In other words, sex can’t hold a marriage together. There will be times when a couple falls out of love with one another; it is inevitable and unavoidable. Their physical desire will ebb and flow. One will withhold sexual intimacy from the other – sometimes for purely innocent reasons, but other times as a means to cause hurt.

In this case, it appears that the wife was simply tired and “not in the mood.” But rather than lovingly conveying her thoughts, she simply “locked the door” and left her husband to speculate and draw unhealthy conclusions. It is unlikely that he left her chamber that night in a happy state and fully satisfied with her rejection of his advances. All of this could have been avoided by a short and simple conversation, but this young couple had much to learn about marriage. 

Her search did not go well. Not only did she fail to find her husband, but she ended up brutally abused by the night watchmen. Fortunately, this was a dream and none of this took place in real life. But this dark aspect of her dream would seem to indicate that she suffered punishment for her refusal to open the door to her husband. In a sense, she blamed herself for his disappearance and suffered the consequences. 

In her dream, the young wife calls out to her friends, begging them to assist her in the search for her missing husband.

“Make this promise, O women of Jerusalem—
    If you find my lover,
    tell him I am weak with love.” – Song of Solomon 5:8 NLT

She regrets her earlier decision and longs to be reunited with her lover. She has learned a valuable lesson and only wants a second chance to renew her love and affection for the one she earlier rejected. This entire section paints an all too realistic view of the marriage relationship. it is not always easy and during the course of any marriage, the love between a husband and wife will ebb and flow. Sexual attraction will have its highs and lows. Poor communication will be a constant source of conflict.

Solomon and his bride were going to learn that a good marriage requires hard work. True love requires commitment, sacrifice, selflessness, and a desire to put the needs of others ahead of your own. The apostle Paul put it this way: “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too” (Philippians 2:3-4 NLT). And while he wasn’t necessarily addressing his words to married couples, they are highly appropriate and applicable.

Solomon and his wife were learning that marriage is a covenant that requires so much more than mere physical attraction. To last a lifetime, a marriage will need the full buy-in and complete commitment of both the husband and the wife. But what makes a successful marriage is not the wholehearted commitment of two dedicated individuals, but the presence of God. He alone can turn a good marriage into a great one and transform two into one.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Awkward Reading But An Awesome Reminder

He

1 Behold, you are beautiful, my love,
    behold, you are beautiful!
Your eyes are doves
    behind your veil.
Your hair is like a flock of goats
    leaping down the slopes of Gilead.
2 Your teeth are like a flock of shorn ewes
    that have come up from the washing,
all of which bear twins,
    and not one among them has lost its young.
3 Your lips are like a scarlet thread,
    and your mouth is lovely.
Your cheeks are like halves of a pomegranate
    behind your veil.
4 Your neck is like the tower of David,
    built in rows of stone;
on it hang a thousand shields,
    all of them shields of warriors.
5 Your two breasts are like two fawns,
    twins of a gazelle,
    that graze among the lilies.
6 Until the day breathes
    and the shadows flee,
I will go away to the mountain of myrrh
    and the hill of frankincense.
7 You are altogether beautiful, my love;
    there is no flaw in you.
8 Come with me from Lebanon, my bride;
    come with me from Lebanon.
Depart from the peak of Amana,
    from the peak of Senir and Hermon,
from the dens of lions,
    from the mountains of leopards.

9 You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride;
    you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes,
    with one jewel of your necklace.
10 How beautiful is your love, my sister, my bride!
    How much better is your love than wine,
    and the fragrance of your oils than any spice!
11 Your lips drip nectar, my bride;
    honey and milk are under your tongue;
    the fragrance of your garments is like the fragrance of Lebanon.
12 A garden locked is my sister, my bride,
    a spring locked, a fountain sealed.
13 Your shoots are an orchard of pomegranates
    with all choicest fruits,
    henna with nard,
14 nard and saffron, calamus and cinnamon,
    with all trees of frankincense,
myrrh and aloes,
    with all choice spices—
15 a garden fountain, a well of living water,
    and flowing streams from Lebanon.

She

16 Awake, O north wind,
    and come, O south wind!
Blow upon my garden,
    let its spices flow.

Let my beloved come to his garden,
    and eat its choicest fruits. – Song of Solomon 4:1-16 ESV

This chapter is filled with so much semantical hyperbole it’s almost difficult to read. Solomon’s attempt to describe his bride’s beauty is so over the top that it borders on the ridiculous and comes across as almost comical. His description of her eyes being like two doves behind a veil is quite a poetic and alluring visual that achieves its objective, but when ventures into characterizing the stunning beauty of her teeth he seems to go a bit too far.

“Your teeth are like a flock of shorn ewes
    that have come up from the washing,
all of which bear twins,
    and not one among them has lost its young.” – Song of Solomon 4:2 ESV 

His point is well made if not a tad bit overdone. It’s clear that he admires the vivid whiteness and flawless quality of her teeth but his attempt to describe them seems a little overzealous and unnecessary. But then again, it is poetry and these words are written by a man who is completely smitten by the love of his life. As he gazes at her in all her bridal splendor, he isn’t necessarily thinking rationally. It isn’t that his words have left him but that they are coming out in a jumbled cacophony of love-infused rhetoric.

Some scholars believe the context of the poem has moved from the day of the marriage ceremony to the evening in which the marriage would be consummated. This might explain some of Solomon’s over-the-top descriptive flourishes. If this is indeed his wedding night, his verbosity is nothing more than a case of nerves; he is overcome by the intensity and intimacy of the moment. We’ll graciously cut him some slack for his gratuitous use of over-embellished similes and metaphors. He can’t help himself.

It’s obvious to all that Solomon is enthralled by his bride’s stunning beauty. On this momentous night, he can see no wrong in her. Everything about her is beyond perfect - from head to toe. Her dark flowing hair reminds him of a flock of goats slowly descending a hillside in an undulating pattern. At this point in the evening, everything is operating in slow motion for Solomon. His mind is fully engaged in the moment.

The Scriptures declare Solomon to be the wisest man who ever lived.

God gave Solomon wisdom and understanding beyond measure, and breadth of mind like the sand on the seashore, so that Solomon's wisdom surpassed the wisdom of all the people of the east and all the wisdom of Egypt. For he was wiser than all other men… – 1 Kings 4:29-31 ESV

We also know that Solomon was a prolific writer, having authored 3,000 proverbs and 1005 songs (1 King 4:32). But when it came time to record his first impressions of his bride on their wedding night, it was as if Solomon’s writing skills abandoned him. He is stringing words together in a stream of consciousness that flows from his heart but seems to fail to engage with his mind. Whether his bride would have found any of these descriptions to be flattering is difficult to say. But Solomon means each and every one of them.

And as he works his way down from her eyes to her hair, then from her mouth to her neck, things begin to heat up. By the time he reaches her breasts, Solomon’s intensity level has reached a fever pitch. It’s almost as if his physical passions have taken over and his mental faculties have completely disengaged. His descriptions reach the point of no return as he desperately tries to communicate what he is seeing and how it is impacting him. For the reader, this is painfully awkward territory. One almost wants to scream, “Put your pen down, Solomon!”

But the writer in Solomon can’t stop himself from trying to convey his thoughts at that intimate and intensely satisfying moment.

“Your two breasts are like two fawns,
    twins of a gazelle,
    that graze among the lilies.” – Song of Solomon 4:5 ESV

One can only hope that Solomon wrote all this after the fact. Surely these were not the words he spoke to his bride on their wedding night. It becomes almost comical to think about Solomon waxing grandiloquent as he gazed at the naked body of his bride. While intended to be flattering, his words paint a rather bizarre image that is difficult to reconcile with the intimate nature of the moment. Once again, the reader is left to hurry past the sheer awkwardness of Solomon’s passion-induced prose disguised as poetry and, thankfully, he provides a much-needed respite.

In the following verses, Solomon calls his bride to leave behind her past and join him in their new life together.

“Come with me from Lebanon, my bride,
    come with me from Lebanon.
Come down from Mount Amana,
    from the peaks of Senir and Hermon,
where the lions have their dens
    and leopards live among the hills.” – Song of Solomon 4:8 NLT

Their wedding night is just the beginning of a grand new adventure in which they will forge a new path as husband and wife. Solomon is clearly excited about the prospect of walking through life with his new bride and her physical beauty certainly makes the prospect of a long and happy marriage that much more attractive. He uses a series of phrases to convey her hold over him.

“You have captured my heart…” – vs 9 (NLT)

“You hold it hostage with one glance of your eyes…” – vs 9 (NLT)

“Your love delights me…” – vs 10 (NLT)

“Your love is better than wine…” – vs 10 (NLT)

“Your lips are as sweet as nectar…” – vs 11 (NLT)

“You are my private garden, my treasure…” – vs 12 (NLT)

This man is in love and, as before, he cannot stop himself from expressing that love with a steady flow of rhetorical flourishes that seem excessively overwrought. It’s not that he’s trying too hard but that his love has literally left him without the proper words to express what he is thinking and feeling. This author par excellence has become like a giddy schoolboy trying to pen a love letter to his first junior-high crush. 

And the entire chapter ends with his bride inviting Solomon to stop talking and consummate their marital relationship. It was time to put down the pen and experience life together, with all its God-ordained passions, pleasures, and joys. This was to be a moment neither one of them would soon forget and it perfectly reflects the beauty of the intimate relationship that God had in mind when He created man and woman and placed them in the bounds of the marital union He had designed for them.

This passage, while somewhat difficult to read because of its awkward intimacy, is designed to paint a glowing image of God’s gracious plan for sexuality and marital intimacy. The author of Hebrews provides a stern warning to preserve the sanctity of marriage at all costs.

Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. – Hebrews 13:4 NLT

The wedding night of Solomon and his bride was meant to seal the covenant they had made to one another in their wedding ceremony. They were now committed to one another for life – in the eyes of God. And as Jesus so poignantly put it, “They are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate” (Matthew 19:6 ESV).

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Great Expectations

6 What is that coming up from the wilderness
    like columns of smoke,
perfumed with myrrh and frankincense,
    with all the fragrant powders of a merchant?
7 Behold, it is the litter of Solomon!
Around it are sixty mighty men,
    some of the mighty men of Israel,
8 all of them wearing swords
    and expert in war,
each with his sword at his thigh,
    against terror by night.
9 King Solomon made himself a carriage
    from the wood of Lebanon.
10 He made its posts of silver,
    its back of gold, its seat of purple;
its interior was inlaid with love
    by the daughters of Jerusalem.
11 Go out, O daughters of Zion,
    and look upon King Solomon,
with the crown with which his mother crowned him
    on the day of his wedding,
    on the day of the gladness of his heart. – Song of Solomon 3:6-11 ESV

In the opening verses of this chapter, the maiden is having a nightmare in which she dreams of going on a fruitless nighttime search for Solomon, her husband-to-be. Her deep desire to be with him has permeated her subconscious mind to the point at which she can’t even get a good night’s sleep. But her disturbing dream has a happy ending that features the two of them reunited and in each other’s arms.

The remaining verses bring the reader back to the real world where the young maiden is seen arriving in style for her wedding day in the royal carriage and accompanied by an honor guard. This isn’t the byproduct of the maiden’s vivid and overactive imagination but it is the real thing. The narrative has fast-forwarded and their long-awaited wedding day has finally arrived, and rather than wandering the streets alone, the maiden is surrounded by pomp and splendor.

The reason this is likely a description of the maiden’s arrival is the word usage in verse six. Someone is inquiring as to the occupant of the elaborate coach arriving in Jerusalem from the wilderness.

“Who is this sweeping in from the wilderness
    like a cloud of smoke?
Who is it, fragrant with myrrh and frankincense
    and every kind of spice?” – Song of Solomon 3:6 NLT

The Hebrew word translated as “this” is in the singular feminine and would not be used if the occupant of the carriage was thought to be Solomon. The text makes it clear that “it is the litter of Solomon” (Song of Solomon 3:7 ESV), but that doesn’t mean he is the one riding inside. The whole scene is painted as a mystery and is meant to provide a contrast to the first five verses of the chapter. The young maiden is no longer alone and desperately searching for Solomon; she has been picked up by a royal escort and is being transported to Jerusalem for her wedding day.

Her fiance has spared no expense, sending his finest coach “perfumed with myrrh and frankincense” (Song of Solomon 3:6 ESV). His coachman are likely decked out in their best uniforms and the silver and gold of the finely crafted carriage have been polished till they glisten in the Judean sun. It is a spectacular scene and the young maiden is sequestered inside the immaculate carriage that Solomon has commissioned for this very special occasion.

The simplicity of the scene portrayed in the opening verses is meant to stand in stark contrast to the opulent pomp and ceremony of Solomon’s wedding day. He has gone to great lengths to impress his bride-to-be with a celebrity-style arrival for her own wedding. This emphasis on image and appearances seems to fit Solomon’s own description of himself in the Book of Ecclesiastes.

I made great works. I built houses and planted vineyards for myself. I made myself gardens and parks, and planted in them all kinds of fruit trees. I made myself pools from which to water the forest of growing trees. I bought male and female slaves, and had slaves who were born in my house. I had also great possessions of herds and flocks, more than any who had been before me in Jerusalem. I also gathered for myself silver and gold and the treasure of kings and provinces. I got singers, both men and women, and many concubines, the delight of the sons of man. – Ecclesiastes 2:4-8 ESV

While Ecclesiastes was probably penned late in Solomon’s life, this love affair with material wealth began early in life. Not long after his ascension to the throne of Israel, he ordered the construction of a grand and glorious Temple for God and a luxurious palace for himself. He went on a building spree, constructing a network of fortifications, storage facilities, and civic buildings all across his kingdom. He also ordered the construction of a one-of-a-kind throne for himself.

The king also made a great ivory throne and overlaid it with the finest gold. The throne had six steps, and the throne had a round top, and on each side of the seat were armrests and two lions standing beside the armrests, while twelve lions stood there, one on each end of a step on the six steps. The like of it was never made in any kingdom. All King Solomon's drinking vessels were of gold, and all the vessels of the House of the Forest of Lebanon were of pure gold. None were of silver; silver was not considered as anything in the days of Solomon. For the king had a fleet of ships of Tarshish at sea with the fleet of Hiram. Once every three years the fleet of ships of Tarshish used to come bringing gold, silver, ivory, apes, and peacocks. – 1 Kings 10:18-22 ESV

The simple young maiden from the Judean wilderness was marrying up. By becoming the wife of the king, she was becoming part of the upper crust of society, and would never want for anything. But her life was about to change in ways she could never imagine. She would be a queen and would be expected to reflect the royal stature of her role – at all times. Her life with Solomon would be under the constant glare of the spotlight. Once the wedding took place, there would be few moments of alone time with her lover. Their marriage would be lived out in the public square for all to see.

But at this moment, riding in style in the royal carriage, the young maiden must have been beside herself with joy. She was blind to any of the potential negatives all this opulence might foreshadow. Her awareness of any red flags was blinded by her love for Solomon and her desire to be his wife. This was her dream come true and she was going to savor every moment of it. At the end of her journey stood her lover, decked out in his royal robes. The young maidens are invited to cast their eyes upon the dashing figure of Solomon as he awaits the arrival of his bride.

Go out, O daughters of Zion,
    and look upon King Solomon,
with the crown with which his mother crowned him
    on the day of his wedding,
    on the day of the gladness of his heart. – Song of Solomon 3:11 ESV

Bathsheba, the mother of Solomon, has placed a crown on Solomon’s head; likely a wreath of garlands intended as a symbol of joy and celebration for this great day. The widow of King David placed a handwoven wreath on the head of her son to commemorate this special day. On this occasion, he was more than a king of a nation, he was the bridegroom preparing to enter into a lifelong covenant with his bride. He would be the king and she would be the queen over a household of faith dedicated to bringing glory and honor to the one true King, God Almighty.

This was indeed a glorious and great day. It was to be the beginning of a wonderful life together. Like any other marriage, this wedding day was filled with joy, hope, and eager anticipation of all the great things that lie in store. But the days ahead would require far more than physical attraction, adolescent adoration, and visions of marital bliss. This young couple was going to need God if they wanted their marriage to thrive and not just survive.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

More Than Skin Deep

She

12 While the king was on his couch,
    my nard gave forth its fragrance.
13 My beloved is to me a sachet of myrrh
    that lies between my breasts.
14 My beloved is to me a cluster of henna blossoms
    in the vineyards of Engedi.

He

15 Behold, you are beautiful, my love;
    behold, you are beautiful;
    your eyes are doves.

She

16 Behold, you are beautiful, my beloved, truly delightful.
Our couch is green;
17     the beams of our house are cedar;
    our rafters are pine. – Song of Solomon 1:12-17 ESV

There is much debate as to whether this poem is in chronological order or if it is a collection of smaller poems that fail to share a common time sequence. If they are meant to follow one another in sequential order, there appear to be some fairly large gaps in the narrative. The dialogue seems to take a fast leap forward between the first 11 verses of chapter one and the remaining six verses.

The relationship between the two lovers deepens in significance and their rhetoric intensifies, describing what seems to suggest is a much more physical and intimate aspect of their growing love for one another. The young Shulammite maiden describes seeing her lover reclining on his dining couch. As she gazes at him she can’t help but feel a deep attraction to him, comparing him to the fragrant blossoms of the henna plant found in the vineyards of Engeddi.

She reveals her hope that the attraction between them is mutual and that her perfume is having its desired effect. She has adorned herself with a necklace featuring a sachet of aromatic myrrh that hands strategically between her breasts. All of this language suggests that she was trying to seduce her lover. She has spared no expense, having anointed her body with costly nard, a fragrant oil that would have filled the room in which they sat. This is the same type of oil that was used to anoint the head of Jesus.

And while he [Jesus] was at Bethany in the house of Simon the leper, as he was reclining at table, a woman came with an alabaster flask of ointment of pure nard, very costly, and she broke the flask and poured it over his head. There were some who said to themselves indignantly, “Why was the ointment wasted like that? For this ointment could have been sold for more than three hundred denarii and given to the poor.” – Mark 14:3-5 ESV

This young woman has gone to great expense to gain the attention of her beloved and her efforts produced the intended result. Despite the strategically placed necklace and the aromatic perfume, his gaze is drawn to her eyes.

“How beautiful you are, my darling,
    how beautiful!
    Your eyes are like doves.” – Song of Solomon 1:15 NLT

They say the eyes are the window to the soul. Looking into someone’s eyes can reveal a lot about their character and their intentions. Jesus described them as lamps that provide light for the body. In a sense, they are portals that control what enters into your heart and reveal its condition to all those around you.

“Your eye is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light. But when your eye is unhealthy, your whole body is filled with darkness. And if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is!” – Matthew 6:22-23 NLT

In praising the beauty of her eyes, Solomon is looking beneath the surface and complimenting her inner character; she is beautiful inside and out. She has adorned herself with jewelry and expensive perfume, but his gaze is attracted to that which lies within. It is not unlike the earlier compliment she gave to him.

“…your name is like the spreading fragrance of scented oils…” – Song of Solomon 1:3 NLT

His name, which is synonymous with his character, is like a well-pleasing aroma that follows him wherever he goes. In other words, his reputation precedes him, but in a good way. There is little doubt that this couple shares a mutual attraction to one another but it is more than skin deep. Their emphasis on one another’s inner character is refreshing and provides a wonderful glimpse into a missing ingredient in many relationships today. With our modern-day obsession with externals, it is so easy to overlook the condition of the heart. Social media allows us to create the perfect persona by providing a means of carefully curating only those images that reflect our preferred identity. Few people post unflattering images of themselves online. The increasing availability of software that can enhance or dramatically alter our visage makes it possible to portray ourselves in a way that is more wishful thinking than reality.

Yet, this couple was anything but lovestruck and blinded by passion. They appear to be fully aware of each other’s inner qualities and that knowledge only enhanced their love for one another. 

But there is little doubt that this young woman was infatuated with her lover’s outer appearance. She makes that point embarrassingly clear when she states, “You are so handsome, my love, pleasing beyond words!” (Song of Solomon 1:16 NLT). He was good-looking as well as being of good character, and those two traits made him all the more appealing to her. The old adage, “Love is blind,” is meant to convey the idea that outer beauty is not the only factor considered when two people fall in love. There is far more to the equation than simply good looks, and yet, it never hurts to fall in love with someone who is easy on the eyes. That is clearly the case with her beloved.

Just being out in nature with her significant other brings her great joy and pleasure. She describes the great outdoors as if it is their private sanctuary.

“The soft grass is our bed;
    fragrant cedar branches are the beams of our house,
    and pleasant smelling firs are the rafters.” – Song of Solomon 1:17 NLT

This should not be taken as a description of sexual intercourse or an inference that this couple was involved in any kind of immorality. She simply describes a carefree afternoon with the love of her life as they share the beauty of God’s creation and one another’s company. Just being together brought her great joy. While they were not yet married and didn’t share a home together, they were able to turn every moment into an opportunity to live as if they were already one.

This relationship was being built on a foundation of mutual respect, shared admiration, unwavering love, and a commitment to the long haul. They were in this for the duration, and while their words reflect a somewhat innocent and inexperienced outlook on love, it is clear that there is more to this relationship than meets the eye.

English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001

New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Love.

Song of Solomon

Place me like a seal over your heart, or like a seal on your arm. For love is as strong as death, and its jealousy is as enduring as the grave. Love flashes like fire, the brightest kind of flame. ­– Song of Solomon 8:6 NLT

This is probably one of the most hotly debated books in the Bible. The interpretations of its meaning are countless and questions regarding its purpose are endless. Some see it as an allegory with deeper spiritual meaning. Others read it as an actual autobiographical story featuring events from the life of Solomon himself. There is little debate that it is a love poem. That is clear from a cursory reading of the eight short chapters. But why is it in the Bible? If all Scripture is profitable for teaching, reproof and training in righteousness, why is this book included? What is it attempting to teach us? As I read through it this morning I was struck by the many times that it caused me to reflect on the love of God. It seems to reveal the kind of love God has for His people and that He longs for them to have for Him. It is the same kind of love that Christ has for His bride, the Church, and that He desires to receive in return. And finally, it is the kind of love that any husband should feel for his wife and she willingly returns to Him.

It is indeed a book about love. Whether it is about real people and real events, I can't say. But it IS about love. And a faithful, eyes-for-you-only kind of love that God illustrates in His love for those He calls His own. It is the kind of love that caused Christ to take on human flesh and die a sinner's death in our place on the cross. This kind of love is selfless and sacrificial. It is passionate and powerful. It is intimate and intense. I cant help but read this book and be reminded of my Father's love for me. I am blown away by the way in which Christ expresses His love for me each and every day. God the Father and God the Son call out to me daily, longing to have a love relationship with me that is two-way, not one-way. But so often I am more than willing to accept their love, but refuse to return it. The Song of Solomon shows love that is given and received. Neither character can live without the other. There is a level of infatuation in the poem that borders on embarassing. The words these two use to describe their love for one another are syrupy and saccharine. The almost feel a little bit over the top and uncomfortable to read – like you're looking at someone's private love letters. But the love expressed here is genuine and sincere. It is intimate and personal. There is a sense of infatuation and focused quality behind the love expressed in these eight chapters that reflect the way we are loved by God and the manner in which we should return that love to Him.

Father, may my love for You and Your Son grow to such a degree that it is almost embarrassing for others to listen to me express it out loud. May I discover the intense kind of love for my heavenly Father and His Son that they have expressed to me so often. Help me to learn to love as I have been loved. And help me to recognize just how loved I really am. Amen