32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.
36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38 So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God. – 1 Corinthians 7:32-40 ESV
There is little doubt that Paul’s view is a bit idealistic. His motivation is sincere, but he is looking at the situation through the lens of his own life. He was a single man who had totally dedicated his life to the mission of spreading the gospel among the Gentile nations. He was totally committed to the commission given to him by Christ and would not allow anything or anyone to distract him. When Paul said, “I wish that all were as I myself am” (1 Corinthians 7:7 ESV), he was referring to his singleness. To the unmarried, he stated his opinion that “it is good for them to remain single as I am” (1 Corinthians 7:8 ESV).
Paul knew that life could be difficult and was full of commitments and requirements on one’s time. There are the daily demands of life, such as work, providing for one’s family, relational issues, as well as societal demands and expectations. For the married individual, those things multiply exponentially. Which is why Paul advocated singleness. But this is where his idealistic nature comes out. He says, “the unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord” (1 Corinthians 7:32 ESV). In an ideal world, an undistracted, fully dedicated Christ-follower may find himself “anxious about the things of the Lord,” but not necessarily. There are plenty of unmarried men and women who find themselves anxious about anything and everything but the Lord. Singleness is not an antidote to spiritual distraction or the cure for an anemic commitment to Christ.
There is little doubt that the fewer earthly commitments and distractions we have, the easier it should be for us to dedicate our time and attention to the things of God. But it doesn’t always work out that way.
Paul writes, “the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:33 ESV). He is not saying a husband’s commitment to care for the needs of his wife and family is wrong. He is simply emphasizing the reality that the married individual will have a more difficult time finding the time to serve God without neglecting his family. Again, Paul is not indicating that caring for one’s wife and family is somehow unspiritual or insignificant. In reality, Paul knew well that a Christian was required by God to love his or her spouse and family well. They were to live out their faith in Christ within the context of the marriage union and display a Christ-like determination to love sacrificially and selflessly.
To be a godly wife or husband is a huge commitment, and that seems to be Paul’s point. As a single man, Paul was completely free to go and do whatever God demanded of him. He had few, if any, commitments that would keep him from responding to God’s call on his life.
Ideally, “the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit” (1 Corinthians 7:34 ESV). For Paul, singleness brought a singularity of focus, and he longed for others to experience that same freedom from earthly commitments and concerns. It wasn’t that he experienced no anxiety in his life, but that any anxious moments he had were usually associated with his mission as God’s apostle. Any worries he experienced were not about domestic issues, but about the state of the church.
At one point, Paul told the Galatians, “I am again in the anguish of childbirth until Christ is formed in you!” (Galatians 4:12 ESV). His concern for their spiritual growth was like that of a woman anxiously enduring the pains of labor as she waits for her child to be born, healthy and whole. Paul had few worldly distractions. He didn’t have a “honey-do” list, carpool duties, soccer games to attend, recitals to sit through, or do-it-yourself tasks to perform around the house. He was free to worry about the things of God, and he desired that same level of freedom for every believer. That is why he wrote, “ I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible” (1 Corinthians 7:36 NLT).
Paul makes it clear that he is not making the state of singleness more spiritual than that of marriage. To get married was not a sin, and to remain single did not make you a super saint. For Paul, it was a matter of practicality. Single people face fewer distractions and demands. They have more discretion regarding their time. Paul told Timothy, “No soldier gets entangled in civilian pursuits, since his aim is to please the one who enlisted him” (2 Timothy 2:4 ESV). He seems to have had in mind a stipulation within the Mosaic law.
When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken. – Deuteronomy 24:5 ESV
Undivided attention is difficult when you have divided allegiances. Paul’s primary point in all of this has to do with devotion to God. He believed strongly that he was living in the last days and conducted his life as if Christ could return at any moment. There was no time to waste. The gospel needed to be taken to the ends of the earth. The message of salvation through faith alone in Christ alone needed to be heard by every person on every continent. To accomplish that formidable mission, Paul knew he needed the help of every able-bodied believer. He simply wanted the Corinthians to know that he was out to secure their undivided devotion to the Lord.
I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible. – 1 Corinthians 7:35 NLT
As Jesus said, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few” (Luke 10:2 ESV). That is the motivating force behind Paul’s words. He lived with the end in mind and deeply desired that every believer would share his passion for proclaiming the good news of Jesus Christ and experience the joy of a distraction-free life dedicated to the cause of Christ.
Father, it is difficult to argue with Paul’s logic, but it is also difficult to accept his conclusion. As a happily married man, I know firsthand that the role of a husband is full of distractions. My wife could easily testify to the many times I have made her walk with the Lord harder than it has to be. But we both know that God has used our marriage relationship to sanctify and perfect us. I strongly believe that we have accomplished more for the kingdom together than we would have even done on our own. Yet, I hear what Paul is saying. I understand his desire to see more believers sold out to the cause of Christ. Show my wife and me how to use our marriage for the good of the Kingdom. Don’t allow us to turn our divinely ordained union into a self-consumed, it’s-all-about-us relationship that loses sight of the Great Commission and fails to put the needs of others first. Amen
English Standard Version (ESV) The Holy Bible, English Standard Version. ESV® Permanent Text Edition® (2016). Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.
New Living Translation (NLT) Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.
